All week, I’ve been planning to write about a conversation Sara and I had on our way to the Children’s Museum. It began as she explained she was desperate. That she needed to go shopping for herself, and that she was ready to brave it with her small kiddos. Then she asked me how I go shopping and where.
Well, this momma has done little shopping since the designer & I married (though I do have my fav spots: Downeast & the Maxx). In our four years (almost 5!) of marriage, we have had 3 delightful kiddos. I added up the time that I have had between pregnancy (and being my rightful size): about 7 months. No need to explain my less-than-desire for shopping.
It seems that with all this growing and shrinking, my clothes don’t really matter as much to me anymore. The desire, rather, is for simple clothing, that will last, and that is modest in style and price. I don’t wear as many accessories as I once did, nor the make-up (and as wild), and I’ve cut off my long blond hair (I love how easy it is, and the little time it takes to care for. No it doesn’t always look wonderful…a consequence of being your own barber!)
Some might say that I am a mother “gone-to-pot” or one who no longer takes care of herself…the kind I vowed to never become. Yet, as Sara commented, “why spend money on expensive clothing when you’re just getting spit-up on and dirtied all the time.” I couldn’t agree more.
Then the thought came to me: that these times when we have young children, we have the opportunity to discover what we truly need, what is really important.
No doubt, we all go about it a different way. My friend Jenn said that she spent the first 4 or 5 years of marriage/motherhood in overalls. That the multiple pockets were so efficient, she was able to easily carry all that she and her children needed within.
As I contemplate our family’s needs, I realize that I want to learn to live a disposable life. What is the point of having things we cannot use, or buying expensive items that I am too worried will be broken? I want to have beautiful things, yes, things of charm, but things that are useful. I realize that ultimately, it is love for my family and my faith, that is all I truly need. (Oh, the sweet mother in President Monson’s last story of the Sunday a.m. session!)
I don’t want to be so attached to anything that my purpose, and callings here in life, are overshadowed by the distractions of material goods.
There are so many wonderful talks given in past General Conferences, and even during the first 4 sessions this weekend, that have given us guidance, direction, and counsel on how to take control of our finances. I look forward to reading from them when they come available this Thursday.
I keep thinking about Elder Hale’s talk that explains the dangerous addiction in pursuing worldly things. As I listened yesterday, I was grateful for the reassurance that this pursuit for simplicity and neccesity is a good choice. Packing this week (and the week to come), I find myself no longer desiring certain things. Handmade, things with meaning, and the neccecities seem the most desirable, and appealing.
We’re going to have a big garage sale in a few months with Lesa and Sara’s families. Moving with more people to a smaller place, aids this process of finding the disposable life, (not that it is the only way). It makes it easier to forgo some things to make room for each other. The designer said I could get rid of whatever I wanted, that most of it is mine anyways (or things I once cared for). There are a few things he would like to save however, that I wanted to be rid of… Balance right? 🙂
Does the disposable life seem appealing to you as well? Are you already living it and have some tips/suggestions you’d be willing to share?